These I learned ...

 

"Live simply so  others may simply live." Mother Teresa

I have wanted so much to watch a great movie yesterday but I kept changing my  mind. It was not because i doubted whether or not the film would meet my expectations (as I do root for the two lead stars.) but it was more on the thought that the money i would be spending to be  inside the theather could be used to something better.

I was thinking of home and the financial situation that we are facing. Dad has just gotten out of the hospital and we still need to buy some medicine. We dont have much at hand and we need to shell out whatever we have to live.

I feel a sense of hopelessness at times. I wanted to give more but i only get to give what i have for now. I have less students at the moment and I also have to fend for myself. I am about to defend my thesis and I also need to pay my school fees. Apart from these, I still need to pay my bills.

I am writing this now while the rain is pouring outside. Sweet music is playing in the background.My heart is pounding hard and I felt like crying. There is really no reason to be sad. It's just that this self has felt so much compassion and is helpless at the moment.

I thought of the good movie that I missed and I realized it was not a bad idea missing it at all as I will be able to watch it in time. I am thinking of the clothes at the thrift store and said to myself, they can wait. I am thinking of buying this and that but decided to delay procuring them. I want to make my family live well and even if this time there isnt much to offer, the idea of simplying life is the best option.

I dont live a very vain life, if I may say it. I am a way very frugal in my spending but the situation that we are in these days has reinforced my simplicity. There is no more room for useless spending. There are better things to think about. More so, there are souls that need to be fed.

I am watching myself and it is a great adventure. It will take time before we can fully recover from this trial but we will be better off in time.

Life is still beautiful. The degree of happiness that i feel doesnt diminish. In fact, i feel more content knowing there are great lessons learned as i deal with life's toughness.

Dad needs to heal completely. He needs to eat and sleep well. My family needs more stregnth.I guess these are more important that having more in my pocket.