Friday, March 29, 2013


The whole christendom is commemorating the death of Jesus Christ today, I supposed. I am a Catholic, yes, and a theologian at that. It has been a while since I forego joining Church rituals during the lemten  season. I have learned to make a  more profound way of remembering Jesus' passion, death and resurrection. I am wholly at home since Monday. There are prayers , meditations and lighting of incense that are done. Because I am alone, it is not difficult for me to keep in touch with what's within me. Alas, my journey has been tough.

With the full moon and the heat, emotions again struggle generally. My body's sore and my breathing dragging. There are issues that constantly haunt me..that of my family(my father's behavior, specially). Food consists mostly of veggies and fruits. I have only eaten rice once this week.:)

This morning, I went to joji's place to practice. Steph was there too. It was really hot and we were contemplating of not pushing through with the asanas. Yogins as we are, we finally convinced ourselves to practice.

I did my primary. I sweated a lot and i loved it. Binding was easier and i felt very light. It was just not to my legs' favor. When i came up from my drop backs, I could not straighten my legs. Joji had to assist me. Dear Universe, Please give me strong legs.:)

Food was very simple but healthy. Conversation was light, humorous and passionate in a way. I love my yoga friends. We were able to watch a film about the Tibetan's practice of choosing the reincarnated dalai lama. (The UNMISTAKEN CHILD)

It was nice lounging with the two yogins. It was a good friday and what better way to remember Jesus' suffering than to be with people with a common cause.

We had to go. It was hot outside. I am filled with peace and joy now. I am glad i perspired and I am thankful for today.


Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Summer thoughts

It's officially the start of my summer break.(At least for a couple of weeks).There are a few things to look forward to during this hot season.
It's my 42nd birthday and another year of being unattached. The beauty of it is that I am still free. What's a bit frustrating is that I still havent met the one that's swept me off my feet.(Or better yet..have i still not gotten over my cinderella syndrome?)Sigh!

I am more than fifty percent bent to grab the chance to venture into another higher degree in theology.For the love of studying, i wish I am doing the right thing.

Then there is my desire to be more dedicated to my practice.With this, I am looking forward to join a series of meditation classes at the Buddhist temple.It is not cool to stay home all the time.The mind wanders off and oftentimes, it's brought me more harm than good.

My prayers are constant for my family. Such dysfunction is happening at home and even if I am far I am still affected. There is a need for healing and strength.

More than all these laments, I am truly grateful for this process of growth. With the moon smiling fully tonight, I am in deep sorrow for all my shortcomings and I am looking forward for a better 42.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Einstein on Buddhism

Einstein on Buddhism

“A human being is part of the whole, called by us ‘Universe’; a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest – a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole nature in its beauty. Nobody is able to achieve this completely but striving for such achievement is, in itself, a part of the liberation and a foundation for inner security.”

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Richard and Amy

Yesterday,  as I was with the whole university community for a recollection, my dear student Richard sent me identical messages telling me he's tired of crying. He told me his wife of more than two months died and that the pain was just too much.

It was a numbing experience for me because the first thing that came  to my mind was to see him and just hug him but I couldn't. It was so sudden and I haven't had any inkling that his young wife was sick.I found time to go out of the session hall and called him.That was the first time I heard him so vulnerable.He was crying still and I really could not say anything more than just asking him what else can I do for him.

Richard is 22 and I guess his wife was 26. Theirs was an arranged marriage but it was a blessed one.He has started loving  her since then.

This young gentleman has shared a part of his journey with me even until the semester ended. I am thankful that I was one of those he had trusted of his decision making..his dilemnas, his growth as married man. More than anything else, we are not just into a teacher-student relationship but we are friends.

With the sudden death of his wife, I cant imagine the pains that he's into. A more than two-month old  union  which was so full of hope and promises for a great future just ended like that.  At 22, and is still beginning to understand what loving beyond love is, I could not envision how he would cope with the loss. Yet, because he's got a strong back up from HIS GOD, there is also no doubt that he would survive and would become a better man.

We had thoughts of meeting together with his wife but I guess it wont happen anymore. All i would have would be more lovely stories about her from a husband who's now bereft of a great loving woman. As I write this, there is heaviness in my heart.

I wish I could visit the wake and if I couldn't the UNIVERSE will certainly bring them my prayers for comfort.

Death is a physical parting, I believe so. It is breaking people's hearts, yes. It is going to be a foe for a while but in the long run too, death will serve as a reminder that this is not our home here and we don't actually own the people we care about. It will allow us then to give what we can to those around while we can. We don't know the hour it will take us but just here.

We need therefore to love beyond love just like what the young wife Amy did to Richard. It is all that matters in life.

I just wish I were as sublime as her. May she rest in peace and I am grateful to her to come into my dear student's life.

Namaste everyone.Let's take care of people we are with.