Saturday, July 2, 2011

This Heart is a bit sad...but joyful


our very first photo during my earlier practices

It just dawned on me today that my very first yoga teacher for six months will be leaving soon.He will have his last class with us next Saturday.As for me, today might be my last with him.My family will be coming over for their weekend visit and  I am not certain if I could still join his class then. I am beginning to be sad.

I had one of the greatest practices today.While on my full backbends, he guided me to stand on my feet.I couldnt really do it when I attended a mysore class, but with him as my teacher, it seemed so easy.He asked me to do it twice with his arms circling my waist.Boy, I did it!

on my birthday at a Greek Resto, with the book he gave
I gave him our send off gift after the practice.Jiah and Angel weren't there so I was the only one who handed it to him.It was a bit frustrating that the size was small.I hope the store could still change it to medium.We talked for a while as usual.

He hugged me afterwards.I remember the first time that we embraced.I felt my teacher's warmth.I was so touched by the gesture.I will forever remember the friendship that we share.

Reality sank in while I was travelling on the way to the pancake house to have lunch.I wanted to cry because my heart was already very heavy. I didnt even know it was coming. I thought I was ready for his leaving as I had learned it for a few months already.I just couldn't cry in front of other people at the mall.I wanted to run home and hide in my bed and just really let my emotions out. I needed to compose myself though.I had to pay my bills and do some food shopping.More importantly, I need to focus.MY anxiety can be controlled, baby.

When I reached home, I looked at our photos and talked to it.I thanked him again and then I cried.I stayed in bed and just dwelt on whatever it was I was feeling.I just had separation anxiety.Who wouldn't have?He is such a special soul for me.My dreams were all revelations of the connection that the two of us have.

Jon with me, angel and jiah during our send off lunch for him @Kebab's factory
Now, that he will be away, Im sure it will be a different vibe in the shala.The universe certainly will help me strengthen my heart.At this juncture, I am just slowly getting better.Crying is healing.

Jon is a great soul.In time, we will meet again.Wherever and whenever, they don't really matter.Here in my heart, he is already etched.My dear guru will surely be missed but I am very happy he's spreading his wings again.

Farewell Jon.Farewell my teacher.Stay peaceful and Happy.

My love and prayers are with you.OM.

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